Sunday Go To Meeting Bun!

Sunday Bun


L. A. Marzulli

My Personal Testimony: How I became born again and Spirit-filled


I was born in 1950 to parents of Italian descent who were Catholic.  As a child I was in awe of what happened at church every Sunday because the priest, who was dressed in robes and was surrounded by lit candles and incense, seemed to my boyhood mind like some special magician between the people, sitting in typical sheep-like fashion, and God.

I didn’t understand anything that was being said because it was all in Latin.  I knelt, stood, tried not to fidget (which was almost impossible in the wool pants that I wore) and when I became older I served briefly, very briefly, as an altar boy.

One of the most traumatic events in my life was the death of my grandfather.  I was only five at the time of his passing, but it was a blow to my spirit and although I didn’t grasp the finality of it as a boy of five, it was life changing.

I remember, right before my grandfather’s untimely death, grabbing his oversized Bible, constructing a make-shift pulpit in front of the long dining room table where my relatives were all eating and, while I couldn’t read a word, giving my first sermon.  I shouted, “What is the truth?”

I recently spoke to my parents about this and they informed me that it was hysterical to all who were gathered at that table long ago.  They said that the more everyone laughed the more insistent, passionate, and serious I became, and this from a five-year-old….

Looking back, it was a foreshadowing of what I do today. But I’m getting ahead of myself!

When we moved from Waltham, Massachusetts, to Berwyn, Pennsylvania, I was 10 years old.  It was a new environment for me and it took some time for me to adjust to the school I found myself in.  It was a Catholic school and for me it was torture.  Like many young boys, I found it almost impossible to sit still and focus on what was being taught.  All I wanted to do was go outdoors and play and run in the woods!  This is the reason why I am still trying to learn the art of punctuation today, because I was totally checked out when this was being taught in the third grade!  Where do I place those pesky commas?

At thirteen I decided to leave the church.   I did so after I went through the confirmation process. This was just unbearable because we had to memorize a gazillion catechism questions.

When the bishop showed up at the church, all of us who had spent weeks memorizing these questions and answers in case we were called were stupefied when the good bishop didn’t ask us one question, not one!    Something in me gave up on the Catholic Church at that point.  In fact, I announced, much to my parents’ dismay, that I didn’t want to go to church anymore.  My mother was aghast; my father took it in stride.  This began the years in which God (whoever I may have thought He was) took a back seat to everything else I deemed important.  He was, for all practical purposes, at the bottom of my list. More truthfully, He didn’t make the list at all.

I went through junior and senior high school and hated most of it.  I didn’t fit in.  Music was my big out and I was the co-leader of the most popular band in the school.  We rocked the house and looked as freaky as possible.  This was the 60s and I was desperately trying to be a hippie with my long, frizzy hair and pimpled face.  Acne really is the bane of young people who endure those teenage years.

I was a nature counselor at the local YMCA during one summer and it was there, at the age of 16, that I met the first girl on whom I really had a crush.  Her name was Michelle and she was only 14!  Before I could take her to the YMCA dance, her father interrogated me—think the real Archie Bunker here!  We were in love, at least as much as immature teenagers can be.  We dated all through my high school years, and then we broke up for some stupid reason that I can’t remember.

It was during this period that the lead guitarist in the band introduced me to marijuana.  The first time I took it I laughed and laughed and thought this was the greatest thing that had ever happened to me.  We moved from smoking pot to LSD and right after graduation, in the summer of 1969, I found myself sitting in the large field with thousands of other stoned- out hippies in what would become the legendary Woodstock concert.

Unlike our former president, I inhaled as often as I could.  Looking back at those days and some 42 years later, I realize that my generation was hoodwinked and lied to.  The Beatles and other bands at the time promulgated the use of drugs.  As many of you who are reading this know, drugs have been the cancer of our society.  When I speak at conferences I sometimes ask the audience to give a show of hands of people who either have been or know people in rehab.  The hands go flying up and to our dishonor it’s most of the audience.  Drugs have changed the moral fabric of this country forever, but I digress.

It was during this time that I was sitting in my room on LSD and reading Michelle’s letters and another girl’s letters, trying to decide whom I should be with.  At the same time I was trying to read the book of Revelation, which was way too taxing for my drug-infested brain!  I was asking (actually more like challenging) that if there was a God, He show me which girl I should be with.  About an hour later (by this time it was around midnight) my father came into my room and announced that Michelle had been killed in a hit-and-run automobile accident.  Remember that at this time I was high on LSD and so my emotions were like Jello in a blender.  I was stunned and I just sat there not being able to move for what seemed like a very long time.  Eventually I went to bed and when I awakened I asked my father if Michelle was dead or did I dream that I heard this.  He informed me that it was true.  This is the one single event that changed my life.  It sent me on a quest that didn’t end until 12 long, weary, years later.

Her death was so final, there were no second chances or do-overs; it was a wakeup call and I was cut to the quick by it.

Michelle’s death started me on a journey to find out the meaning of life.  To discover who God is, or better yet, even if He existed at all.

I began to read everything I could get my hands on.  I read books on the occult, tomes by Carlos Castanada, Blavatsky, Euspensky and others who introduced me to the New Age paradigm.  I continued to experiment with drugs, looking to be enlightened by them.  I went on vision quests and very often when taking psychedelics I had horrible experiences.  I realize now that all of these drugs were gateways into the occult, stepping-stones to the world of the Fallen One and his dark purposes.

What was the purpose of this life?  Why were we here?  What was the meaning of love?  I pondered these and other questions looking for answers but not finding any.

After three years of searching, and now 21 years old, I still had not found what I was looking for.  I heard about a course called Silva Mind Control, which was invented by Jose Silva.  I took a friend along with me and we signed up for the course.  I had no idea what I was getting into, but the flyer that I had looked at promised me that I would have the ability to diagnose and heal those who were sick.  We were told to lie down on the floor and visualize a workroom. Then we were told to create imaginary counselors to help us in this workroom.  My counselors were Jesus, Curly, of the Three Stooges, and the Lone Ranger.  LOL!  I figured that each of them could be trusted.  Much to my amazement they would appear with me in my imaginary workroom.  We have discussed some of what this is in the pages of this book.  I was being indoctrinated into the occult, using meditation and what is known as guided imagery to catapult me into the unseen world of the spirit.

When we graduated we had to perform a test to see whether or not we could function as “seers.”  I was handed a 3 x 5 index card with a name on it, nothing more.  I was then told to diagnose the illness this person had.

I went into my workroom with Jesus, Curly and the Lone Ranger and together we diagnosed what was wrong with the person.  I would use my hands, like a human X-ray machine to scan the person while my eyes were closed.  I “saw” what was wrong and announced it.  “He has a growth on his brain.”

The instructor smiled at me while nodding knowingly and said, “Correct.”

I had passed the test. What wasn’t told was that through the technique of Silva Mind Control I had opened myself to real spirit guides.  (For a more in-depth view of this, you can go to Sharon Beekman’s book, Enticed by the Light).  She vividly portrays what happens when a person opens himself up to these entities.  Please remember also that we are told in the Guidebook to the Supernatural to avoid any contact with these malevolent impostors!

I continued my esoteric studies and now I was reading about the holy men, the mahatmas of India: how they would sit and attain enlightenment.  And how the Fakirs, denunciates of the world, could perform miracles and feats of superhuman strength and endurance.  I was intrigued by what I was reading and began to think about going to India.  It was around this time that someone gave me a poster that stated …the God of the universe had come to earth in the form of a 14-year-old boy named Guru Maharaj Ji.

The 14-year-old guru was going to appear at a theater in Philadelphia.  I found myself sitting with hundreds of other hippies in the crowded, non-air-conditioned theater.  There were no seats left and my friend and I sat on the floor in the aisle.  If I remember correctly there was a band that played and we listened to their music.  Then we waited for what seemed like forever.  Finally the guru showed up.  There was a chair set in the middle of the stage on a dais.  It was more like a throne than a chair.  It was draped with wreaths of flowers.  When the guru came out on the stage, most of the audience fell to their faces voluntarily.  This is called pranam.   It is meant as a sign of respect and submission.  Much to my surprise I found myself stretched out on the floor in this pranam position.  Someone on the stage called out:  Bo-ley shri- Satguru Dev …and most of the audience replied, Maharaj ki ji.  Looking back it now reminds of the mindless Nazi salute and cries of Heil Hitler, although I’m certainly not comparing the guru to Hitler.  At that point everyone settled back in their chairs as the guru began what would be about a two-hour lecture.  It went on and on and on!  The central core of his message was that he was dispensing knowledge.  This knowledge could only be given by him and was unknown to everyone else.  Only through the gurus appointed mahatmas, a holy man, could someone attain the bliss that he promised.  He then went as far as to say that all the other gurus and masters before him were dead and that a person needed a living perfect master to show them the way to peace and enlightenment.  I believed every word of it.  This seemed like what I was looking for and I feverishly scrawled the address of the place where this knowledge was going to be given out the next day.

Secret Knowledge or Deception a Go-Go?

I arrived at the house where the mahatma was going to give those in attendance the secret knowledge early on Saturday morning.  The place was packed with hippies.  We all sat on the floor.  It was a summer’s day and it was hot and we were cramped into this large one room spilling out into the hallway.  The mahatma arrived and the session began.  He talked all morning and most of the afternoon about how this knowledge was special and how the guru was the perfect master.  He told us how important it was to practice this knowledge and then almost at the end of the day, and at this point everyone was exhausted, he began to dispense the secret knowledge. Before I get into what happened, I want to relay to you one incident that made such an impression on me that after almost 40 years I still remember it vividly.

There was a man named Dennis who was trying to get this knowledge along with the rest of us.  He was crippled and deformed and had steel braces on his legs.  The mahatma literally shunned him.  He looked at him with such disdain that it was obvious to everyone in the room.  There was not an ounce of compassion from this so-called enlightened man—who was going to give us the secret knowledge so we could be just like him—and that hit me like a rogue wave breaking at Zuma beach!  It shocked me and, although I wasn’t able to articulate what offended me about the mahatma’s actions then, I can do so now.

In Indian culture they believe in reincarnation.  This is when a person is born over and over again and, depending on his or her actions, comes back in a higher or lower caste.  It also has to do with the so-called laws of Karma.  This is where actions that are deemed good or bad are carried over to the next incarnation and these actions decide where you are in the Indian caste system.  Brahma caste is the highest, while the untouchables are deemed the outcast of Indian society.  Much of this has changed in the last 100 years, but the mindset is still very much alive in India today.

What this mahatma was reacting to with Dennis is that in his worldview, that of believing in reincarnation, Dennis must have committed some grievous offense for him to be crippled like he was in “this lifetime.”  It was a glaring example of where this so-called enlightenment leads and it is one of segregation and working one’s way to a state of perfection by countless reincarnations.  This is a false system and the fruits of it are apparent from the mahatma’s attitude toward Dennis and his unfortunate condition.  There wasn’t any compassion or empathy from the “enlightened one” toward Dennis; there was, in fact, open contempt of him to the point at which some people in the room began to shun Dennis, too.

The mahatma was dressed in a saffron-colored robe and his head was shaved.  He had this “blissed-out” look on his face, meaning that he smiled and appeared holy and enlightened.  Of course he had a retinue of attendants who cared for his every need and whim.

He moved around the room and dispensed the secret knowledge.  I was in a state of heightened awareness at this point and waited expectantly for my turn to come.  The first thing he was going to do was to open our third eye.  This is the spot that is located between the eyes in the center of the forehead.  It is where our pineal gland is located and in many occult initiations opening the third eye is the springboard, or gateway, to the lower astral or what I have come to call in this book, the second heaven.

I sat there waiting my turn and then the mahatma was in front of me.  My eyes were closed and I felt him put his finger on my forehead.  Nothing happened at first and then suddenly I saw a circle that opened up and became a stream of colors and light images.  I just sat there taking it all in and feeling special that I had now obtained the first part of this secret knowledge.  I opened my eyes and looked around and everyone had the same goofy, blessed-out smile on their faces.  We had been initiated and we had seen the light, literally!

Next the mahatma came and placed his fingers in our ears.  When he did, I immediately began to hear flutes and the sound of rushing water.  This really startled me because it was playing in my head.  I opened my eyes and the mahatma laughed at me and told me to close my eyes again.  Then he took my hands and placed my own fingers in my ears.  The music continued for some time and then it slowly faded away.

At this time Dennis called out because the mahatma had passed him by with both the opening of the third eye as well as the music.  He whined and looked and acted like a little boy who was being picked on.  The mahatma grilled him for maybe ten minutes to the point where Dennis was literally groveling in front of the mahatma begging him for the knowledge.  Finally the mahatma reluctantly gave in and dispensed the guru’s knowledge to what I would now call the American untouchable, Dennis.

Next was the nectar.  He showed us how to put our tongues behind the uvula of our mouths and to keep it there until this divine nectar began to flow.  Sure enough I tasted something sweet trickle down into my throat from where my tongue was jammed against my uvula.

The last part of the initiation ceremony was receiving the holy word. We were told that we were to meditate on this word day and night.  That this word was the primordial vibration and that we were to empty our minds and focus on this word….

The mahatma told us what this word was and after receiving it our initiation was complete.  We had received the secret knowledge of inner light, music, nectar and the primordial word.  I/we were on the path to enlightenment, or so we all thought.

In the Ashram

I got home and went to my room feeling elated and went to sleep. When I awoke the next morning I remember feeling whole and good for the first time in my life, because I believed I had finally connected with God.  I immediately sat up and stuck my fingers in my ears to hear more of the “divine music.”  Sure enough after a few moments it began, faintly at first and then louder.

This experience had a profound impact on my life.  I felt that finally, after years of searching, I had found the truth.  I changed my diet and became a vegetarian.  I went to the local ashram and listened to what is called Sat-Sang, which is supposed to be divine discourse on the knowledge that Maharaj Ji was giving to all who asked.  It wasn’t long before I decided to give up worldly things and devote my life to the guru.  I moved into the Philadelphia Ashram and became a full-time devotee of the guru.

Our schedule was this:

We were up at 5 a.m. when we gathered in front of an altar and sang a devotional that is called Arti.  It was the same song over and over again every day and one of the lines was … rights and rituals won’t reach the goal!  However, if that was true then why were we all engaging in the same ritual day after day?  After we sang Arti, we would then have an hour of meditation.  I remember sleeping through most of this because                                                                        I was exhausted from only getting five hours of sleep a night!  However, there were a few times when the light would explode in my third eye.  Please don’t be confused by this, as it is nothing more than an occult practice that has deceived millions of people for thousands of years.  It is nothing short of a demonic light show and is one of deception.

After a vegetarian breakfast we would go to work.  This was my routine day after day.  At one point I joined the orchestra of the guru’s brother and found myself flying to England to play.  For me this was a dream come true.  The orchestra was about 56 pieces with another 10 or so people to manage, provide food, and schedule events.  We played at many of the guru’s appearances.  We were gearing up for an event called Soul-Rush. This was a 10-city tour of the East Coast and Midwestern U.S. to attract people to the 1974 Houston Astrodome event known as the Millennium.

We finished the Soul Rush tour and settled into the long, hot summer days in an old hotel somewhere in Houston, and prepared for the big event.  I thought at the time that this was it: the end of the world as we knew it.  I remember calling my parents and friends and telling them to try to come to Houston.  We were all that brainwashed and believed everything we were told.

The event came and the Astrodome, which holds thousands of people, was hardly filled.  An estimated 10,000 people showed up for the event, a far cry from what Maharaj Ji and the leaders at the top were expecting.

There was a large dais that was set up on the stage. There were chairs on this dais that was probably 40 feet above the floor of the Astrodome and they were for the members of the guru’s family who were referred to as the “holy family.”  The orchestra was seated on the stage directly below the thrones.

The big night came and the “holy” family paraded out, followed lastly by the guru himself, who then perched on the highest throne.  Now I have told you all of this to get to this point.  The crowd began to worship the guru and the other members of the family.  At this point one of my band mates nudged me and told me to look at the family on their thrones.  When I did this I couldn’t believe what I was seeing.  They were there, but they had changed.  They looked different.  There were other entities that night that manifested on that stage and looking back now almost 40 years later, it is my opinion that what I saw was the demonic manifestation that in-dwelt each of these people.

I stayed with the guru for another year and then I left because I was disillusioned, and here’s why: We were rehearsing for the “Big Event in Houston” that turned out to be anything but.  At this point I had practiced meditation and done all that had been required of me, however, there was no peace.  One night I went into the large hall that was used for Sat-Sang and meditation and I lay down prostrate in front of the ever-present chair bedecked with flowers for the guru.  I cried bitterly, my sobs coming in deep uncontrollable heaves.  It awakened other people, as I was told later, but no one came to see what was going on.  Something broke in me that night and I realized that, while I had practiced the knowledge that the guru had given to me, and done so religiously, in my deep inner core, at the soul level of my being, in my spirit, nothing had changed.  I had no terms to articulate this at the time, but it was the beginning of my leaving the phony, blissed-out, mindless state of practicing meditation with the guru.

After the dismal turn out in Houston, the so-called holy family had a rift between them.  This rift continues to the present day and here’s a link that you can go to check it out for yourself.

Maharaj Ji is still telling people that they can have peace through his meditation, but take it from me, it’s nothing more than New Age, phony baloney.  There is only one Prince of Peace and it certainly isn’t this guy.

The orchestra moved to Hollywood, California, and we settled in a hotel on Hollywood Boulevard.  We would walk about eight blocks to the rehearsal hall to practice every night.  We were about four guys to a room that was supposed to hold one person.  We had a drag queen living across the hall, drugs were openly sold and used on the premises, homosexuality was practiced by so-called celibate followers in the orchestra, and, on top of all this, we were supposed to meditate and attain enlightenment.  What a crock!

One amazing moment came when I borrowed a motorcycle and got on the Interstate 10 Freeway knowing that it would lead me to the Pacific Ocean.  As I drove through the McClure tunnel I could smell the sea air, and as I came out of the tunnel and into the light, the blue expanse of the ocean sparkled in the midday sun!

I have never forgotten that moment, because it was like I had found my home at last—California.

Okay, I could go on and on with this, but I’m going to cut to the chase.

The orchestra moved out to a place called Camp Joan Myer, a camp for the blind, located at the northern part of the city of Malibu.  It is set on a hill overlooking the ocean.  It was there that I really began to question the guru and the meditation.  I was with another member of the orchestra and we were both having difficulty believing the so-called party line.  He stated that if you were told you were a god from the time you were a baby, what would you believe?  I nodded and a few months later I left.  However, while I was there we had a mahatma of great importance visit us.  I watched this man perform occult, demonic “miracles.”  Here’s what I mean:

We were walking on the beach with this mahatma and he spoke very little or no English.  It appeared that he wanted to go into the ocean.  He then began to undress and I heard in my head, hold these.  I didn’t believe what was happening.  The mahatma looked at me and shoved his clothes into my arms.  I was stunned.  We watched the “holy man” go into the water and submerge himself under a wave.  When he came out, he put on his clothes and began to walk with us.  Now the next part is very strange, but I know what I saw and I’m not making this up.  As we were walking, the mahatma was suddenly gone.  He was 50 yards farther down the beach.  The other people whot I was with were shocked, too!  This man clearly demonstrated occult power by using mental telepathy and bi-locating.  He had power, but as you have read throughout the pages in the book, I believe that that power was demonic in nature and was given to him by a diabolical source.

The orchestra relocated to another residence in Malibu, downsized its numbers, and when it appeared that nothing more was going to come of it, the leaders decided to move into the city.  This is when I jumped ship and left the guru.  The northern part of Malibu in 1974 was quiet and serene with large amounts of vacant land.  To my 24-year-old brain, I had found paradise.

Now what is pertinent to this testimony is that in a six-year span from 1974 to 1980 I still meditated, sought after the occult, read about the New Age, and in 1976 found the book by Edward “Billy” Meir, UFO Contact from the Pleiades.  This book was pivotal for me as it re-introduced me to the UFO phenomena.   I began to believe that UFOs had seeded us here, that they were the gods of antiquity, and that they were going to come back for us!

I had seen a UFO when I was at Boy Scout camp around 1962.  I left this part out in the telling of my testimony because I think it fits better here. Here’s what happened.

My UFO Sighting

I was 12 years old and in love with Boy Scouts.  I was at Camp Horse Shoe, which is located in Rising Sun, Maryland.  I was with three other boys and we were taking a shortcut back to our camp so we wouldn’t miss lunch. The lead boy, who knew the shortcut, led us up this boulder-covered ravine. We were making our way up this ravine when the boy who was in front yelled, “Wow, what’s that?”

The other two boys chimed in, “Yea, what is that?”

“What are you guys looking at?” I asked.

“There, in the sky,” they answered, and all three boys pointed up toward the sky.

I looked and to my astonishment, there, standing out against the cloudless blue mantel, was a silver disc.  It was metallic and made no noise. It hovered motionless for maybe 20 seconds and then suddenly shot straight up into the sky.  In a blink of an eye it was gone.  We started shouting and ran as fast as we could back to the camp.  When we got there we cried, “We saw a UFO! We saw a UFO!”

The ridicule from the scoutmaster and other boys began almost immediately.  By sundown that night the three other boys denied that they had ever seen anything.  I held tenaciously onto my story.  I was made fun of the rest of the weekend but refused to change my story or deny what I had seen.  It was my first real-life example of what I would call, “herd mentality.”

Vision Quests

As I mentioned earlier, I read everything by Carlos Castaneda who was an anthropologist and wrote about his involvement with the spirit world using mescaline and marijuana as a spring board into the dimension where these beings resided.  I was hitchhiking one day and was picked up by a guy who, like me, was a hippie.  He had a joint going and offered me some.  I eagerly took it and inhaled as deeply as I could, holding the smoke in my lungs while feeling the drug explode in my head.  Even writing this I have to pray against the feeling.  (You couldn’t pay me enough money to get stoned again, because I believe it is a gateway to the second heaven!)

I got dropped off at the bottom of Encinal Canyon, which is right off Pacific Coast Highway, and started walking up the canyon.  The sun was beginning to set and at this point I was really wasted.  I found a little pathway that led off the road and followed it.  It took me to a little clearing that overlooked the expanse of the Pacific Ocean.  I sat down and began to meditate.

I sat cross-legged and felt at one with the universe!  (LOL)  The thought exploded in my mind that everything was connected, everything was one, there was no separation, and that if everything in the universe was connected and one, then there was nothing to fear.  I pondered this for a while and it made sense to me.  I felt like I had just been given one of the secrets of the universe.  Then, I suddenly heard a rattle sound coming from directly in front of me about 20 feet away.  I opened my eyes and was startled and wondered what could be making that noise.  I knew that rattlesnakes were common in these hills, but this was no rattlesnake.  Then I heard the noise again, this time coming from the right of me, still out about 20 feet away.  I thought, maybe someone was playing a trick on me, but I realized that there was no one out here, I was alone, and, besides, how could a person move noiselessly through the chaparral without me hearing them?  I was getting sacred and wondered what was going on.  Then I heard the noise, except this time it was directly behind me.  Then, again in front, except this time it was closer.  The noise grew louder and louder as it continued to circle me.  I suddenly became very afraid and my mind raced back to the Carlos Castaneda books that talked of encounters with spirit beings similar to the one I was encountering now.  Whatever it was circled again growing closer with each pass that it made.  Then it was right in front of me.  Now remember that at this point I was still sitting cross-legged on the ground.  Something came at me and gently pushed me backward and held me there.  If you were in the “lotus” position this is impossible to do as the weight of your upper body would tilt you, and you would fall over backward.  This was not the case though.  This demonic spirit, I call it that because that is what it was, held me there for a while and then slowly let me up.  Once it did, I jumped to my feet and started slamming my open palm against my thigh.  This was a technique that I had read about from Castaneda who used it when a spirit that he did not want to deal with would come to him.  This action would apparently repel the spirit.  Once I had done this, another thought came into my mind and it said that if I had opened myself up to the spirit it would have been able to take me out of my body and shown me the secrets of the universe.

I know, some of you are reading this and thinking, where can I get some of this stuff?  Don’t be swayed by the lie that I was told, because that is what it is.  Let’s walk through this for a moment and examine the two messages I received.  The first one told me that I was connected to everything else in the universe, that we were all one, and that there was nothing to fear.

This is called Pantheism.  Briefly stated it is the belief that we are all one.  It is not true because you and your pet dog or cat are not connected!  You may love your pet, but you are not your pet and your pet is not you.  This philosophy is the basis of Hinduism and I believe that it is a lie.  We are not all one…period!

The next lie was that if I had trusted the spirit I would have been taken out of my body and shown the secrets of the universe.  They can actually do this; however, the price we pay by giving permission to do this is that this familiar spirit, who is a demon, now has the right to possess us!

After the (demonic) spirit left me I slowly got up and made my way back home, unnerved and changed by the experience.  Drugs are a springboard into the lower astral or the second heaven and should be avoided at all costs because we can pick up unwanted entities who will not readily leave us when we later realize who they are.  This kind of experience can lead to possession.  I was lucky because this did not happen to me.

Chasing the Rock and Roll Carrot

During this time I was performing with a band all over Los Angeles. We were chasing the ever illusive, rock-and-roll carrot.  We came close several times but never managed to snag the record deal.  I was nearing 30 years of age and my dream seemed like it was never going to happen.  I had spent the previous five years of my life doing carpentry to stay alive by day and rehearsing, recording, and playing gigs around town at night.  In short, it was a life that was going nowhere.

In 1978 I partnered with a friend and we built a “spec house” in Malibu Lake.  I had sunk every dollar and all my energy into the project.  We were hoping to turn it over quickly and build another.  It seemed like a good way to make a living and we were both good at it.  Just as we were trying to sell the house the market collapsed and interest rates soared to 20%.  The house sat on the market for two years and I lost everything that I had invested in it by the time my partner agreed to buy it for much less than we had listed it.

I had also become somewhat of an agnostic.  I had it up to my eyeballs with trying to find God and enlightenment.  My philosophy was eat, drink, and be merry because we’re just going to reincarnate anyway so who cares!  Someone gave me some books by Taylor Caldwell and I read them. These were novels that depicted the lives of the apostles.  I found them fascinating.  Then my girlfriend at the time gave me a book by David Hunt entitled The Cult Explosion.  As I read through it I realized that I had participated in many of the cults that Hunt was trying to warn about in his book.  At the end of his books was a little prayer that you could say if you wanted to ask Jesus into your life.  At this point my spec house was still on the market.  I was in debt up to my eyeballs.  I was living with a girl and we weren’t married and I was spiritually bankrupt as well!

I remember thinking to myself, I wonder if it’s real?

I repeated the little prayer asking Jesus into my heart and asked Him to come into my life and change it.  I looked around and waited but nothing happened.  I shrugged it off and went about my life.

About a month later I awaked from a very vivid dream and I wept in the arms of my girlfriend.  Something had broken deep inside and although I didn’t know it at the time, Yashua/Jesus was beginning to do a work on me.

I was at a dinner party and a friend asked me if I believed in Jesus.  It was an out-of-the-blue question.  Much to the amazement of my girlfriend, I replied that I believed in Jesus and also considered myself a Christian.

There was a moment in time that I shall never forget.  It was when the Most High God took me out of the kingdom of darkness.  My girlfriend set dinner in front of me and then something broke.  I thought I was losing my mind.  I was being bombarded by thoughts that weren’t mine (unwanted thoughts).   It was terrifying.  I didn’t know what was happening to me, but the thoughts kept coming and they were horrible!

We went to bed and I had a very difficult time trying to get to sleep. My girlfriend had called a friend of hers at work and she was given the name of a pastor who I was to call for help.  The next morning I awakened and I called the number.  I thought I was having a nervous breakdown.  We set up an appointment for later that day.

I also received a call from a man who would become my mentor for the next two years.  His name was Wayne Kendall, to whom this book is dedicated, and he told me that I wasn’t going nuts.  While this was comforting to hear, it didn’t stop the unwanted thoughts!

Later that day I met the man who would counsel me for the next three years on a weekly basis.  In the beginning we met two times a week and then it went to one time a week and finally to once a month.  Pastor Fred eventually married Peggy, my wife of now 26 years, and me.  But I’m getting ahead of myself again.

I then met Wayne and we became good friends.  Wayne was 20 years my senior and we worked together in construction day after day.

I want to let you know that this was like being in spiritual boot camp.  I ate, breathed, and immersed myself in the Bible.  I worked all day and went to any and all Bible studies, home groups and church services that I could find.

I returned home one day only to find that my girlfriend had moved out and taken everything with her, including her bed.  I slept that night on the floor.

Night was a very difficult time for me and I slept with a Bible clutched to my chest.  It was my spiritual teddy bear.  Upon awakening I would read the Psalms and Proverbs and get on my knees and pray for peace.  This went on week after week.  Unfortunately, Pastor Fred and Wayne knew little about deliverance or putting on the armor of God as we are told to do every day in Ephesians 6.  I was also never told about the authority I have in Christ!

(As I write this I want you to know that there isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t put on the armor and get ready for battle!)

One night as I put my head on my pillow I heard a roar as something tried to enter my body.  I cried out, “Jesus help me!”  The attack stopped and I lay there for a few minutes paralyzed by what had happened.  I called Pastor Fred and we prayed on the phone and afterward I went to sleep.

I was under attack constantly for years; meanwhile, the Lord was busy re-wiring me, as Wayne liked to call it.  There were days that I honestly don’t know how I ever would have gotten through them without Wayne and Pastor Fred’s help.  Thanks guys.

Remember that I had been willingly involved in the occult since 16 and had been meditating and doing other occult practices for 14 years.  I had been firmly entrenched in the camp of the Fallen One without knowing it.  How’s that for deception?  You see how subtle it is?  The entire time I was in the New Age, I thought I was on the right path toward spirituality and enlightenment; instead, I had opened myself to what the Guidebook to the Supernatural calls the doctrine of demons.

There was a point where I was exhausted, fed up with the more than two years of attacks.  Wayne and I were going into the market to get something for lunch and I remember asking, “How long do you think this is going to go on?”

I had asked that question of Pastor Fred, too, and he had replied that he had never seen anyone struggle as much as I had, but he assured me that God knew what He was doing and at some point the struggle would end.  (Think the book of Job here because it is similar in that the Fallen One was allowed to attack Job for a period of time, but then the Most High God stopped the attack and restored Job.)

I was in the market, feeling overwhelmed with the thousands of brightly packaged products, the lights, and the bustling shoppers, in short, everything.  I put my stuff on the conveyor belt and waited anxiously in line.  The conveyor belt moved, and suddenly from underneath the cash register where it reappears, I spotted a piece of paper.  I realized that it was tract.  I picked it up and opened it.  How it got there, I have no idea.  In most cases the cashier would have spotted something like that and disposed of it, but not this time.  I was next in line, and holding onto the tract, I paid and left the store.  I got back to Wayne’s car and began to read it out loud.  It was my first spiritual warfare lesson and it was the day that I began to get free once and for all from the harassment of the enemy.

The tract said that when we are hit with a thought—just like the ones I was having—we were to say, I am dead to you and you are dead to me!  I am a new creature in Christ, old things have passed away!  I am dead to you and you are dead to me!

The biggest weapon that I was handed that day was this life-changing phrase that was included in the tract.  It was, The Blood of Jesus!

The tract told about the blood of Jesus and why the demons flee at hearing it!  It spoke of the cross and the battered body that bled for all humanity and by that blood, once, for all mankind, paid the price for the sins of the world.  The Lamb of God who takes away the sins of the world!

I began to say, The Blood of Jesus, when the attacks would come and I began to get the victory.  That was almost 28 years ago and I still say The Blood of Jesus on an ongoing basis.  It is our BIG cannon, or the mightiest arrow in our quiver to fight the enemy!  Remember he goes about as a roaring lion—I heard that roar—and seeks to rob, kill, and destroy.

I got the victory because of the Blood of Jesus.  I am a new creature in Him because of what He did on Calvary.  His blood covers me/us and it is what makes the Fallen One and his minions tremble in fear, because they know that on that day, when Yashua’s blood was shed, it spelled their defeat and certain doom.


In closing this “testimony”

This was not my idea to write this, and it is the first time that I have endeavored to do so.  I felt, or should I say, I was instructed to include it in this book so people could understand and grasp where I was coming from, what I had endured before I was a Christian and also after I became born again.  Mine has been a road traveled that I would not wish on anyone.  Those first three years of my Christianity were the most difficult years of my life.  I wouldn’t wish them on my worst enemy.  Yet, He was with me even in the valley of death, literally!  Everything that I am today is because of Him.  If there is anything good in me, anything worthy of praise, anything that I might be remembered for, it will point to Him who is the savior and keeper of my soul and spirit!

76 thoughts on “Sunday Go To Meeting Bun!

  1. Best Bun Ever.

    Just one question. When you were talking about the rattle snake demon did you mean to say you were getting “sacred”?

  2. WOW! That is a doozy of a bun! I had many moments that I could relate to as I read it……I am of the same generation, in fact pretty much the same age so maybe that is why. But at every one of those, I was reminded that Christ calls us to Him and He knows his sheep and His sheep hear his voice…..hahaha, some of us just took a little while to turn down the radio and hear Him! Funny that we were the first headphones generation!
    Your testimony is so powerful because it gives such a feeling of security that He will let us learn and keep us safe even when we are just too young and stupid to know that He will be our greatest love someday after our wild child searching proves fruitless!
    God bless you dear friend! and if it makes ya feel any better… brilliant and studious grand daughter read something I wrote and said “Grandma, you broke the 17th comma rule” ….HUH? Did you know there were 17 comma rules? Guess that was a third grade lesson?

  3. Beautiful testimony, I thank God for what He has done in your life! It appears that God is nudging some people with some heavy testimonies to share them NOW. I am currently reading of Bonita Petroff’s on a cross in the wilderness’ blog. Powerful- just like yours. Thank you for sharing, it builds our faith.

  4. good bun, I read all this in The cosmic chess match but its good to hear again. I do have one question though. You state that you smoked marijuana but you immediately jumped off into LCD. Why such a big jump from a simple plant with no side effects to such a dangerous Mind destructing drug? The only drugs I have tried as christian is Alcohol and Marijuana and as long as both are taken moderately its completely fine with no side effects or sinful acts. You cant become addicted to Marijuana so I obviously assume that it was easy for you to drop but how did you stop taking LCD? I have some non christian friends who are completely addicted to the Drug and cant seem to ditch it. How long did it take you to overcome LCD? I know your opinion on Marijuana how you think its a springboard but would you also say alcohol is a springboard? Because from my point of view Alcohol messes me right up if you get drunk off of it and it messes up my moral decisions which is why I no longer drink but Marijuana I am completely the same and can make all the right choices, you just feel a body buzz. But my question is how did you stop taking LCD?

    • “Jesus is Lord” I think you should do some more reading about marijuana from the viewpoint of competent health professionals instead of relying on your dealers sales talk.

    • I have done my research Ghillie, If you can show me any scientific evidence of it being harmful I will believe you. Most of the common folks think of it as the devils plant lol and that it is unhealthy. Please show me one study of it being unhealthy! Cannabis the correct name before the 1950’s was the most prescribed medication before it became outlawed because the health industry wants you to buy their pills and all the other money hungry industries were losing money off of this plant! It can be used for clothing, paper, medicine and even to make oil! Thats right Henry Ford even made a car that ran off hemp oil! I forgive you for your ignorance Ghillie but you really should start researching for yourself before you just listen to everything you hear on TV! Im not promoting Hemp im just saying that it should not be illegal and it is not harmful at all!

      Since the start of time there have been 0 deaths from Cannabis, just try to prove that fact wrong

      I doubt God made a mistake when he made the Hemp plant and then also created THC Reciptors in your brain

    • You’d have to be high to miss the fruit that come out of marijuana use…

      Cartels… human trafficking… illegals… money laundering… institutionalized slavery… bolstering the black market… santa muerte…. decriminalization of all drugs for personal use in Mexico — including the most addicting…

      Sorry to miss this yesterday. I’ll make up for that now.

  5. Thanks for sharing your testimony! A lot of us got taken in by that new age crap! I had always wanted to do the Silva Mind Control Classes, but never had the money! Praise the Lord for that! Glad we (you and I and hopefully many others!) are no longer a part of that, but are now saved by the precious blood of Jesus Christ! What a deliverer! What a savior!

  6. Thank you, Lynn, for telling us about your amazing journey to and with Christ–as I read it I found myself continually wondering “What’s taking him so long?!”–to realize Jesus is Whom you needed, lol!–my own journey had less time with the occult, but the satanic attacks went on for years–however, our heavenly Father, and the Lord Jesus were with me every step of the way, no matter what–I had gone into hysterical shock from what happened to me, and the demonic that came at me from my unwise usage of an ouija board–alone, in my basement–when it worked, it not only shocked me nearly to death, it somehow opened up that ugly passageway between here, and where ‘the demons are’–I can’t thank God, our heavenly Father, enough for literally helping me to realize His reality, then answering my plea for His help, by leading me to His Son, Jesus–nearly against all odds–it’s been 37 years since the day I literally met Christ Jesus, but I know I probably couldn’t even be sitting here writing this if it were not for Him, and His great love, and saving power, and ability to keep us safe from harm from the evil one and his minions–amen.:) God’s blessings to you and yours.

    • ouija boards. I don’t have any personal experience with them but have heard and read so many stories that it disgusts me that Toys-R-Us sells them as toys. They’re even available in pink for little girls.

      I contacted Toys-R-Us about this but they ignored me. Perhaps they need to receive a petition from people who have previously used ouija boards. Just a thought.

    • I have had experience with ouija boards in my college days. Needless to say, it was a very stupid thing for me to do. There is nothing particularly evil, and certainly nothing magical, about the board itself. As a matter of fact, we just made our own board with marker on cardboard and a peanut butter jar top. There is a kinistetic connection between the impulses of your brain and low level muscle twitches that move the puck. What IS evil is what are giving you those impulses in the brain. There is no discernment of spirit. You are tapping into lying spirits that want you to dig deeper into the occult. It’s like the gateway drug of marijuana. We had two scary experience that had to do with a surge of energy. One where a candle holder shattered spotaneously and another where a powerbox outside our window blew up on its own. Scared us to death. Ouiji boards ARE bad, but what is worse is the daily acceptance of demonic influences of everyday people with not even so much as a fight. We are in spiritual warfare and must place the armor on daily.

  7. An awesome testimony and it touched my heart and soul! I can relate in many ways! God bless you and i love reading your posts and blog! Very inspirational!! Be well!

  8. Thanks LA…and I don’t mean my thanks to sound trite. It’s inspiring to know I’m not the only one who went through literal hell to get to the promised land…but, hey we survived, the Lord preserved us! Somehow I keep hoping it was intensive training for something the Lord still has up His sleeve. Okay, I’ve been since 1973, for whatever it is that God called me for…and that is so far a 38.5 yr wait. Hmmmm. I often think maybe it’s all just an illusion, but I keep on keeping on anyway…there’s no where else to go! Much as you speak about being a prisoner to the occult, I feel like the apostle Paul when he talked about being a prisoner of Jesus Christ…an ambassador in chains.

    • I am seeing a definite theme here today! You are absolutely right Andrea…..I think that there may just be a whole army of us that went through such times of dumb kid experimenting with other things so that we could be absolutely faith filled because He led us back to Him when we were window shopping in the travel brochures for the churches of Sodom and Gommorah! I know I feel so blessed that I did not fall off the precipice when I was too close to the edge!
      I remember taking tarot cards to the sidewalk outside and setting them on fire as I said a prayer of repentance……neighbors musta thought I was nuts in that close townhouse complex!!!!
      Back to my point……He is always in complete charge and knew we would serve Him better in these times than if we had just been little copycat automaton Christians who “believed” and did the church ritual just because Mom told us to?

    • Thanks Elaine, you know, we tend to identify a “biblical” 40 year period as the number of years the Israelites got to wander in the wilderness because of their unbelief! So often, I’ve wondered why it seems like I also am wandering/wondering…38.5 years, that’s almost 40!~ But today as I was outside working with my horses, the Lord reminded me that Moses was 40 years under God’s instruction (being refined in God’s Holy Fire) between the time he fled Egypt, as a son of Egyptian royalty, and when he returned, as a type of God’s Messiah, to deliver Israel out of Egyptian bondage. Pause and think about that!

    • I guess I am a slow learner since I accepted Christ as my savior at about 8 years old. I had joined a brownie troop and we all stood around a mirror on the floor with leaves laid around the edge to be a fake pool and took a vow to honest trustworthy and true and I took that seriously. I was really going to be a perfect person by being in that organization and I would be surrounded by friends who were pure and good…….long story short; within a week I knew that it wasn’t gonna do the trick. Another brownie told a lie and I was devastated.
      Then at church one week I found myself crying and going down for the altar call because what I had been searching for was Jesus and He had been there all along! I know I was young but I really meant it and after quite a few sessions with the pastor of that church, he believed my sincerity and baptized me. Praise Him that He called me to Him so young because my adolescent wandering in the dessert was more like 45 years before I really grasped what an amazing, miraculous and incredible Savior He is and let go and made Him the complete ruler of my life! I was always a “Christian” but I still kept trying to be the brains behind my plans and schemes! Then a few years ago I finally said “I give up… me Lord” and ya could almost hear him say, “It’s about time!”

    • Elaine, I remember that fake pool w/the brownie/girl scout “ritual”! Wow ~ that was a long time ago for me but I always had this little rebellious streak & thought it was bizarre & I wasn’t that interested in staying w/ the GS for the long haul. Now I hear they are really off into some PC agendas.

    • Yeah, planned parenthood!!!! I must be in a permanent fast from thin mints. That is the heart breaking part, LOL

    • Wow, I am a male so this brownies ritual is new to me. I just took a look at that and read the little backstory. Is it just me or is that filled with occult style symbolism and ritual?

    • years later…..yes, I do think it is weird ritual but at the time it seemed like a city kids way to create a woodland pool and there was blah blah about being a reflection of all the good things girl scouts stood for and the promises we were making to be sooooo good…..hmmm, crafty how the creepies try to trick us everywhere from cradle to grave!

    • Well it is a little more than ritual aspect of the ceremony. I have researched quite a bit about the occult for a book I am writing and they are obsessed with the “sacred feminine” and moon cycles, which is all code words for fertility and the female anatomy. The connection maybe too overt and taboo for some to contemplate, but you have little girls standing over a mirror in skirts. Brownies are mythical creatures that are evil spirits in nature. And the brownies pins are subtle in their depiction of a girl with sprawled legs. And I hate to say it but the whole darn pin is a stylized version of a vagina. The girl scout pin as well. I know the clover representation is there, but I am of the opinion it is.more than that.

      Seriously warped and icky in the implications. I feel terrible and must go shower and pray to the Lord now.

  9. Great testimony, LA!

    I blush to confess that I had saved a link to your March 29th radio show and didn’t listen to it until last night — wow. Now I’m wondering what will try to show up in Chichén Itzá on December 21st. (CS Lewis said it’s dangerous to think the Devil’s too strong … but also dangerous to underestimate him. Count me among the latter, I guess.)

    Everyone who hasn’t heard that show: do listen to it — and persevere in the face of the early (demonic) audio difficulties. To whoever it was on this blog who linked to the YouTube: my most sincere thanks! And here is the link again:

    I live not too far from Mt. Pisgah and Chimney Rock. New Age portals: who’d o’ thunk it? The absolute *last* thing we need here is an influx of demons….

    • I hear you JLL” the last thing” we need here in the Asheville area is more demonic influence and some places around town you can feel it in your spirit. The place here is crawling with new age occultists, Wicca, and the like. God help us be mighty warriors to do all we can to defeat the out croppings of the fallen one wherever possible!

    • Yes asheville is interesting! Die hard real Christians and die hard new agers and lots and lots if drugs there. There are some huge spiritual issues with the police force there too. Its a tiny town, but powerful people and their spiritual connection have put a lit of dark power there.

    • If anyone from Asheville or the surrounding area can give a report on the “Revive Asheville” movement that took place all of last week, I personally would love to hear of the mighty works that our God has done in this war against the evil one and his works in that town.

      I greatly thank any and all in advance for even one testimony or report.

      Respectfully in Christ,

      Jeff D

  10. Thanks for sharing your testimony. I think its only fair that you post a picture of you and your high school band tomorrow. I have a picture in my mind but I would like it confirmed.


  12. I was just hit by this thought today and wanted to share, I feel the Lord impressed it upon me. I was reading revelation last time and was perplexed by the absent of the temple being built as a sign of the times. Jesus in Matt 24 and Luke 21 gives us warning signs of the time. Israel brought back as a nation is a great sign of the times. Jesus doesnt mention anything about the temple being re-built for the end times. It says God will bring out a new Jerusalem and new temple after the judgment day. I felt the temple being rebuilt is an assumption made based on the abomination of desecration. I was thinking about that and then boom it hit me. Jesus says our bodies our the temples and the Holy spirit dwells in us so we have access to the holy of hollies. Why then would the temple need to be re-built. So the Jews can have sacrifices? Salvation is through Jesus now. Then it hit me! Maybe the abomination of desecration is a hybridization with the mark of the beast to change our DNA. Satan’s seed would then reside in the temple(our bodies)! Had that thought today.
    God Bless and Look up!

    • I think you are right, but I don’t think it will get that far, (dna chane etc) I think it’s just putting a chip in your body identifying yourself as a product and your in the alliance of the govt and not God. We are the temple, rev 12 talks about measuring the temple- meaning God is measuring His people and then it proceeds into talking about the two witnesses.

    • The King James Version doesn’t actually even mention an abomination of desolation being set up in any temple.

      Daniel 9:27
      and for the overspreading of abominations he shall make it desolate, even until the consummation, and that determined shall be poured upon the desolate.

      To me it sounds like for Israel’s abominations he will desolate the temple (and institute a new covenant) and it will remain so until the consummation. In other words, no new temple building.

      And you are absolutely right PP. A rebuilt Jewish temple, if it were built, would be completely meaningless because God would not dwell there. And if God is not there, then how can Satan desecrate it? If it is rebuilt, it will mean nothing to God and therefore it will mean nothing to Satan.

    • My husband and I have both had the same thoughts, PP… our bodies are a temple and the bible says He will not dwell in a temple made of human hands so I think that rules out the idea that the temple “building” will be rebuilt. And if the whole world is expecting and looking for the mark of the beast to be a certain thing (i.e. a chip of some sorts) then I’d put money on the fact that it won’t be what everyone is looking for! Satan is much too clever for that. The thought about it being DNA is interesting and definitely something I’ve pondered in the past. If something sets itself as god in the temple (verse paraphrased) then… hmmm… it makes ya wonder!

  13. Why do you go about making documentaries and writing books about others when you just gave the synopsis of a great novel?

  14. Oh my goodness….I can’t believe I’m posting a comment here. I don’t know how I found the link for this blog, but I enjoy reading it daily, along with the site. I have a feeling my comment may be a bit long… I want to apologize ahead of time for that!

    I was glued to your story L.A.! Thank you for sharing it. I had a similar experience that I rarely share with anyone because the few times I felt bold enough to tell it, I was received with either blank stares or comments like, “oh. wow”. I know what I experienced….and yet people just don’t want to know about the enemy of our souls and how he is actively and deceptively trying to destroy us.

    My experience didn’t involve drugs, but I did open myself up to spirits by reading Shirley MacLaine’s books, and for about a year or so thought I was “opening myself up to God” and trying to “find myself” by “meditating” and trying to have “out of body” experiences. I look back at this time of my life and can see how God lovingly kept me protected (I had asked Jesus into my life many years earlier while in Jr.High and I now I know that once the Holy Spirit resides in you, no other spirit may enter). However, very bizarre things occurred around me during that time, like an across the alley neighbor who would play acid rock at the highest levels and hang one leg out of his two-story window as he screamed horrible profanities at me and the world. Coincidence and odd timing? I don’t think so.

    I kept hoping for a closer relationship with God by having crystals around me, and doing the things I wrote about above, but nothing seemed to be changing for me. Then one day, I got news of the death of my cousin. It was a sudden and unexpected death and I was very sad about it, and felt compelled to “help him to the light” by praying (talking….not really praying) to him and telling him to go to heaven (such twisted an un-scriptural practices!). I was “praying” to him during the evening, and several hours later went to bed. What happened to me about 3AM that morning is something I will never forget and was most certainly the event that God used to set me straight and to get me back on track with Him.

    I was lying on my back in bed and I thought I had opened my eyes. There was a dark, shadowy, rather ghostly form floating a few inches above me. I could feel evil. I was holding my breath and have never been so frightened in my life. I screamed and my eyes flew open. I thought I had been awake…but I guess I wasn’t….I knew it wasn’t a dream….it was different than a dream. My throat was sore from the scream. I asked my mom (who was in the other room) the next day if she’d heard me scream – she said no. That was THAT for me. Getting a glimpse of that “darkness” whether real or a dream, was enough for me to go running back to the REAL God. I asked Him to forgive me and felt Him telling me to throw away all of the crystals and books. I tore each page of those books in half so that no one else could read them and be deceived, then they went into the trash with the crystals. I also felt God telling me, in no uncertain terms, that I was to no longer read the daily horoscopes. I believe that God was saying to me, “ANYTHING that had to do with finding guidance or wisdom, from any source other than the BIBLE, was forbidden”.

    A few months after this “dark floaty thing” hovered over me, the movie “Ghost” came out. I was watching it in the theatre and as that scene came on to the screen where that dark spirit comes to take the bad guy away, I had a bit of a panic attack because that is what the thing looked like. I kept telling myself, “it’s a movie….it’s a movie” but ya gotta wonder where “Hollywood” gets it’s ideas.

    For anyone who is reading this, I just want to say THANK YOU….for allowing me to tell this story!!!! It’s one that (like I said) I keep to myself for fear of people thinking I’m a wacko.

    Here’s what I know so far in life: Jesus is Lord, God is God and I’m not. 🙂

    • Cassie, no matter the responses you get from people I strongly encourage you to keep sharing your story as often as you can. You never know when the person listening has had a seed planted previously and your story is the next step in their journey to God.

    • Cassie…be bold and keep telling it. YOU were chosen for that experience. Took me a while too but after what continues to happen to us, how can we not tell it? if Cassie or John’s testimony can save a single soul, it’s worth it if we tell it a zillion times. But can a girl singer write a song about it? Hmmmm……

    • So glad you shared your experience Cassie. Just a little word of advice for Rapture Ready. Be cautious what you share there if you post comments because they will block you without warning for sharing a dream/vision or experience outside what they consider “safe”. Not a whole lot of flexibility there for the supernatural.

  15. 22 years ago Yeshua reached through eterenity and saved me too LA. I partied with anything and everything I could get my hands on and lost a wonderful wife. In the same year I lost both my parents. I felt God was ignoring me and if He was all powerful He would snap His fingers and all my troubles would go away. Since He wouldn’t do this He didn’t love me and was purposely causing me harm. I challenged Him to do something if He was really God.

    Then He did.

    God never answers your prayers how you want Him to. Instead, He gives you what you need. In the next moment I was dying spiritually…forever. I remember thinking physical death is irrelevant and insignificant. I finally humbled myself and fell to my knees in the middle of swirling black void completely alone in time and space.

    Then, the smallest pin prick of light more brilliant than the sun appeared, yet you could look at it, and the swirling black void receded in terror. I was in the prescense of perfect love, although human words are not enough to describe it. I cried and shook at how I had lived my life and begged Jesus for His gift, HIs precious blood. He gave it to me unreservedly without limit.

    Today I shout His name from the rooftops to all who will listen. Drop His name at the market, at work, people at the park, the bank, anywhere and everywhere. I try to give away all the love Yeshua has been giving me.

    Why me? I can’t answer…but what I can say is He did it for me.2k years ago He was tortured, beaten, and murdered just for me. And I know He loves me so much, He’d do it again if He had to such is His love for me.

    I love you Jesus with all my heart and all of my soul…


  16. LA, when I read your Cosmic CM book I was wondering what instrument you played in the guru’s band? Still wondering after reading today’s post.

  17. Revelation 12
    10 And I heard a loud voice saying in heaven, Now is come salvation, and strength, and the kingdom of our God, and the power of his Christ:
    for the accuser of our brethren is cast down, which accused them before our God day and night.
    11 And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony; and they loved not their lives unto the death.

  18. I have a mixed understanding of what happens under the influence of marijuana, LSD and other psychedelics, cocaine, heroin, etal. I was saved as a child, but went on to live like I was hell bound for many years…all the while doing any kind of drug I could get my hands on starting when I was 16 yrs old. I know that the drugs certainly altered my ability to “see” into other dimensions, but, possibly because I was saved already, I was never permitted by the seal of the Holy Spirit to pass through those portals that I could see into. In fact one night when I almost o.d.’ed on heroin, I fell into a kind of morphine comatose state and I dreamed there was a dragon encased inside a huge mountain. The dragon’s head stuck out the top of the mountain, and it’s arms were desperately trying to reach me but it was restrained by the mountain…it’s arms could only reach so far…and I was out of reach. I mean it scared the crap out of me, and woke me up, but I had to really fight to keep myself awake cause I was really under it.

    Like the time I stupidly was out pushing my 1 yr old daughter in the stroller from the upper east side of Manhattan to the Village. It was @ 3am and I ducked into a tiny little corner coffee shop. The shop itself was the shape of a triangle. A man sitting at the counter asked me if I wanted to get high…sure I wanted to get high. I’d already been high all day long…earlier in the day, I’d just turned the corner on 83rd street onto Madison Avenue (NYC) and a car pulled over and the guy asked me if I wanted to do some speed. Of course I wanted to do some speed, so I took my daughter out of the stroller and jumped in the car. Away we went to upstate New York. We got high on speed all right and by the time I got back to 83rd street, I was too high to sit in the small apartment so I went out strolling. It was already getting dark and I decided to stroll through Central Park over to the West Side to the Dakota Bldg and see if John Lennon and Yoko Ono might be out and about…nope…so I went to a cafe on the corner and ended up talking to two Scientologists…making it up as I went. So, the story went that I was in New York City alone, didn’t know anybody and had no place to stay. Well, the chick went home, but the dude walked with me all the way to the Village and then said he had to go home. On our way to the Village, we walked through the theatre district and the guy pointed out the theatre where he and his wife were producing a play about the exact story I had told him. Well, since I was making it all up, I figured he probably was too.
    Anyway, I ran the same story on the guy sitting at the counter in the triangular coffee shop at 3am and he said he’d rent me a room for the night. So we went to this little dumpy hotel on Elizabeth Street and he rented the room, we went up and smoked some dope and suddenly…I looked over at him and he had morphed into this little short ugly guy with dried blood on his bottom lip and the lenses of his hornrimmed glasses were going around and around and around in a black and white spiral pattern. I literally felt part of my brain fly out the window. But…for some reason, I did not panic. I was already standing with my child in my arms and when he came forward and laid his hands on her chubby little legs, I reached for the door knob, pulled the door open, stood in the open door way, and said, “I think it’s time for you to leave.” He just sat there dumbfounded as I made the sign of the cross with my two index fingers and started singing, Yes, Jesus Loves Me as loud as I could. It wasn’t long the manager came up to see what the ruckus was and I said, “Get this guy out of here.” He took the guy downstairs by the elevator and I took the stairs to make sure he was out. When I peered around the stairwell I saw the guy looking through the glass in the door with his face pressed against it and both his hands on the glass beside his face. Wow! I was freaked. I went back upstairs and took my Bible in my arms and cradled it like a baby. Don’t ask me why I had my Bible…but I was too stupified to open it…I just hung on to it for dear life. Anyway, the next am…after a sleepless night, I might add…the hotel manager gave me a piece of paper with an address on it…an S & M shop called Everything For Everybody. Ha! I really felt like I’d come face to face with the devil himself that night. It was evil to the max.

    I thought once marijuana became legal, it would be okay for me to smoke it some more because I’d never really been allowed to go through the portal that I could see when I smoked it. So, I tried it again…as a substitute for the chronic pain medication I was taking. Well, it didn’t do much to alleviate the pain, but I was happier when I smoked it first thing in the morning. After smoking it again for 11 months, I woke up one day and said…Why am I doing this? It’s not doing a thing for me except coating my lungs with tar.

    Maybe I am crazy…who knows?

  19. Excellent and beautiful way of expressing Jehovah’s undying love for His creation Brother Lynn.

    Thank you for sharing it for all who are able to maybe for the first time, find someone they can relate with as your life journey to the one true God epitomizes so many of the “Flower Power” generation. From the “light of darkness” to “The Light that exposes the darkness”!

    One thing that Satan cannot do is refute the testimony of a true born again Christian. What you have done is POWERFUL in sharing the victory of Jesus Christ in your life over the many and various lies of the enemy of our souls.

    May the Lord continue to bless and guide you and the ministry He has raised up to lead through you as you daily take up your cross and follow Him alone.

    In Christ,

    Jeff D

  20. God bless you LA. Thank you for sharing. I have been stalked by demons also and can relate. There is power in the preciouse blood of Jesus. There are times when the spirit world seams more real to me than the physical. When God cured me of whiskey I had the expirence of having snakes crawling all over me and bugs and the smell of fresh earth for about 8 to 10 days…it was horrible. The Lord delivered me.
    I am praying for you and all the saints as I hope you are praying me. Bless you all, In Jesus Holy name.

  21. When and how did you first come to believe UFOs are demonic? I also saw a UFO years ago but it was different than what you describe. I saw an “orb” which followed me in my vehicle several miles late at night. I pulled off the road to get a close look at it and it was definitely not something of this world. It stopped when I did and sat motionless in the sky a couple of minutes, then slowly moved away diagonally. I was a Christian at the time (still am), but had no concept of UFOs being demonic (not a subject discussed or even brought up in most churches). I did not know what to think about the experience and have never talked about it much. I never forgot what I saw but did not accept the popular explanation of UFOs being visitors from advanced civilizations – that explanation was not compatible with my understanding of the Bible. Due to the job I have, I still do not talk much about the subject or what I personally saw years ago. Without going into detail, I am subject to a thorough investigation every few years to maintain my employment, and tales of encounters with UFOs could definitely put my career at risk. I have read and heard teaching similar to yours on the subject, and I accept it as the only logical explanation in agreement with what the Bible tells us. I have shared the experience with a few people (primarily fellow Christians) and will continue to in hopes I can warn people about the nature and origin of UFOs. I too believe they are part of a coming deception, and many will be led astray who have not thought about the subject in advance, in light of God’s word, when (not if) UFOs/aliens are openly revealed to the world.

    Thank you for bringing attention to this important subject. We are truly experiencing a growing similarity to the days of Noah. It is disturbing to contemplate what may soon be coming to the world, but exciting to know Jesus our King will soon return to claim his own. God bless you and continue sounding the alarm!

    • If nothing else, I’ve found the topic of UFOs to be a great “gateway” witnessing tool for non-believers. Everyone’s heard of them but not that many have really thought it through. If you’re able to construct a logical argument starting with Gen. 6 (what a gift God gave us when he included that chapter in the bible!!!), then you’ve opened the eyes of your listener ever so slightly. How cool is that?

  22. For help with addictions, demonic attack, and deliverance:

    “” (Unshackled! 50 years of deliverance testimonies in radio drama format … and still going strong)

    “” (Nearly nightly hours of deliverance and prayer and testimony)

    “” (Exposing the darkness — You shall know the Truth — And He shall set you free)

    All in the Name, by the Blood, through the Word, and from the Love of Jesus Christ / Y’shua Messiah / YHWH Adonai in the flesh !!!

  23. Great testimony. I read the whole thing in one sitting. Cosmic Chess Match has just been bumped up on my reading queue and it’s now next 🙂 (You should be honored..I bumped T. Austin Sparks!) I’m an ordained minister and I worked at Teen Challenge for awhile, and even though I’ve never touched drugs (besides marijuana), the pull to try heroin was unbelievable. Even though I’ve seen what it does and I’ve personally witnessed the withdrawals, the temptation was still there! Thankfully, I never tried it.

    • drug/drəg/
      A substance that has a physiological effect when ingested or otherwise introduced into the body, in particular

      so anything such as Caffeine, Tylenol, Advil, Nicotine, Alcohol, Marijuana and a million other substances that effect your body especially all the doctor prescribed crap

      so what you are saying is stay away from these too?

      all I was trying to say is cannabis is a natural plant that grows and nothing special is added to it. It produces THC naturally and if it is ingested or smoked you will feel the affect of THC

      Cannabis can also be used to cure certain diseases, not even Alcohol can do that but its still legal and because it is everyone listens to the Government and agrees with him as well, all im saying is if it doesn’t produce sinful fruits then there is nothing wrong. Moderation is key, im sure most have a drink here and then if it doesn’t effect you in a negative way.

      Just empty your cup that has been filled with media garbage and think for yourself, why is this plant said to be so evil? How come it was the most prescribed drug just under 80 years ago? It would grow for free meaning free medicine, but now we just have every answer in a pill! The magic pill

    • I agree that it is as natural as caffiene that grows on the coffee bush and should be legal. Or coffee, tea and even aspirin made from willow bark should be made illegal to be fair?
      I tried it in the 60s but didn’t like it….I think because my blood pressure is naturally low. I just wanted to sleep…no fun!….but the bible tells us to obey the laws and weed is illegal. It may change and we could revisit this discussion but not until the law is changed.
      I also think it is a gateway drug because the user must aquire it through a criminal drug pusher which brings them into proximity to worse drugs.

    • My daughter used it beginning as a sophomore it was a gateway drug to a final crack head. I have never seen a productive pot head. I would like to know what moderation would be? I tried it once under pressure as ayoungmarried adult/mother. The idiot had some laced with ?? It was devistating. I we both had young babies in cribs maybe 3mos old if that. I hallucinated several things and the one sufficating until I was able to release the thought! NEVER again and didn’t want it then. Why does a Christian need this, it’s definately, I don’t care what you say NOT like a cup of coffee, or tea!!!!! Workers all acting under the influence yeah sounds great to the Glory of God. Don’t comment back to me re. it’s benefits I’m not interested! I have to live with her actions ev. day of my life and she’s now in her forties. A wasted life God had created for Himself and a son she couldn’t care for! No one knows what defects a person has and how the outcome of a substance will be. At least Christ’s Body should not need this false peace with the precious HS to be their peace. How about Faith seems that needs to be used more fully! Ask L.A. how he feels about it, well I think he just stated you couldn’t pay him enough to go there again!!!!!! He prays over the thoughts just recalling those experiences.

    • Yes I can agree with that, im just saying to look at the facts its not something crazy which most people who don`t do the research will believe because that is the only information that is given to them. I also can say that it is not for everybody, just like how Alcohol is not for everybody. I can also agree that we are told to follow the law of our government and that we should for everything its just I believe some laws are unjust! Taking away someone`s free will is corrupt but by following the law you are safe. The worst side effect from Marijuana is getting arrested lol seriously. But what will happen when certain laws come into effect and they go against what you believe, a time will come when the government will not be on our side. But I agree with your point of view

    • if your using it as a party drug just like using alcohol as a party drug and just to get messed up then yes 100% sure you are going to experiment with other drugs. My sister is an example of that, and I will say 100% of the time the gateway drug that leads into all drugs is….. Alcohol. Most people start partying with this first then move on the marijuana then they get tired of that high and want to get messed up even more so then they go on to shrooms, LCD, Coke, Crack and so forth until they get their ultimate high and by then they are a mess. Its how you use it, for example I myself am in school for computer engineering and am working full time right now until school starts back up in September, I only smoke 1 joint a day before I go to sleep and thats even if I feel like doing it. For me it just is the ultimate relaxer when im tired and sore and just want to relax and watch a movie. It is all about moderation and the circumstances you are using it for. By the way I am 23 and have only tried and will EVER only try Alcohol and Marijuana. I no longer drink though as Alcohol would get me into trouble for not thinking properly, I know only smoke every now and then to relax.

  24. L.A. I just got to finish your testimony got pulled away; those were troublesome times, I also know the feelings of that economical crash!! Thank you Jimmy! So glad we have ‘come through” and are under the blood of Christ!! “What can wash away my sins, nothing but the blood of Jesus!”

    Talk about on the job training that God does through our choices! What was meant for evil, God was planning for good and for this very hour you were born into(Before the Foundations of the World)! We don’t have to worry quite so much about your Mayan encounter since you have seen it/spiritual warfare before, and we KNOW God said he will never leave us, or forsake us, we are hidden IN Christ and He holds all things together. Nothing can touch us He doesn’t allow! It’s the allowed we worry about lol

  25. Nomeleste… I mentioned before my grandson loves to listen to unshackled! 12yrs. old. Maybe becasue he’s lived first hand being actually abandoned by his Biological pot/crack mother!!! He worried if she was alone on the streets and angry and resenting her at the same time! Try pot make it legal and fullfill yourself those who desire it, but don’t blame GOD for the results. “He is our Peace who has broken down every wall, He is our Peace, He is our Peace”. His Bio-mother is trying to recover her life, she has nothing, she’s ADHD(self medicating!) She would be homeless if not for some people, has done many rehabs and will never be free and one sec. from falling again! I spent 20 yrs dealing with the results, drug dealers, Speed manufacterors with guns, scary dark neighborhoods to save her and now I have given her to God and help raise her son with my younger single daughter who adopted him. Millions of grandparents doing this, so pot proponents go ahead make your day!

    • I can assure you the crack did that to her, I pray that she will return because a fall into those hard drugs will destroy anybody. My uncle is on the same road and his battle is with Crack. But ill leave it at this, everybody has their own viewpoint and some things are not for everybody. Pot will not do that to you but everybody has an opinion, I respect yours but disagree!

      May Jesus deliver your grandson as thats a dangerous life that nobody wants to see anybody go down!

  26. LA, first off I absolutely love your blog and books, they have really changed my life. What you say makes perfect sense. I know am armed with knowledge and fight for righteousness in the name of Jesus everyday. I can’t thank you enough.

    The only thing I seem to disagree with you about is cannabis. It is a completely natural substance that facilitates nothing but positivity, humility, calmness, and perspective. It makes me want to do good, help others, and optimize my life to honor God. It is not physically addicting such as other drugs, prescription pills, or even alcohol. Prescription pills are extremely physically addicting, and create tons of negative side effects. Why are they legal and cannibis is not? Simple, they can’t make money if everyone is growing their own medicine. Pure evil of greed by big pharma.

    I think the problem is that it gets a bad name from society, and that the hippies and many people today use it for the wrong reasons. They use it to “get messed up” when it was not intended that way. Perhaps why you feel against it is because you used it when you had many other negative influences in your life, which could change the effects.

    Remove all the society brainwashing, and you have a green plant created by God himself. The medicinal research is certainly there, and it has many beneficial compounds in it. I feel like the fallen one is launching an assault on cannabis, in that he’s trying to get people to use it and think of it in the wrong way because he’s afraid of what will happen if people start using it in the right way. If cannabis is so evil, then why did God create humans with a neuro receptor whose sole stimulation is THC? God doesn’t make mistakes.

    I’ll close with this. I actually have had a personal experience that is most certainly divine and from the Lord, not demonic or malicious. (I know this because I have had similar headrushes in other times in my life, such as praying the rosary just after I was born again, or just after reading the bible one night) This was not after smoking but before it, as I touched a nug about to smoke it. I can tell you with absolute certainty that the herb is not a gateway to evil based upon the revelation I received. LSD and all that other garbage most likely is (hence why I don’t mess with any of it), but cannabis facilitates nothing but positivity, love, and peace if you are right with the Lord.

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